We Have All Cheated on the Love of Our Life

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Falling in love can be a very beautiful thing. When we find that special someone it feels like there is nothing we could ever do to show them how much they mean to us. We think about them constantly. I have been personally blessed with a wonderful woman, and there are few things in life that I am more thankful to God for.

As relationships continue, our fluttery feelings can become an even stronger companionship. We give of ourselves, and invest in our partner. Eventually, if the relationship continues, the couple becomes like two halves of one heart. Their bond is worth more than any material gift. Each individual becomes a treasure to the other.

This is a beautiful thing. It is unfortunate, however, that companionship isn’t always this pretty. It has been estimated that 30 to 60% of married people commit infidelity in some way, shape, or form. It has also been estimated that cheating within a relationship is the second most stressful event that an individual can experience in life. This is preceded by the death of a loved one.

Recently a close friend of mine told me about one of his relatives that had been cheated on. This poor person, like many who have been hurt in this way, tried to end his own life. If you have been through this, understand that there is hope. God can pull you through this.

I am deeply sorry if you are someone who has suffered through this. I don’t mean to be insincere to any of you who have faced this hardship. Please seek God, and do your part to be a loving and forgiving follower of Him. Each side of a cheating relationship is traumatic. Most people (whether they have experienced this or not) would probably admit that cheating is a horrible thing. A vastly painful betrayal.

Although this type of situation is difficult, it brings up a few extremely important questions.

Why is cheating SO hurtful? Why is it SO offensive? Why is it SO wrong? There is an answer to these questions that ALL of us need to carefully consider.

Why is Cheating so Painful?

There are many facets to why a relationship that endures cheating can be so painful. I have a theory, however, of what the main issue is. When a couple becomes invested in one another, the value that they place in one another begins to grow. The more that is invested, the more important they become to one another. Eventually, each person’s partner becomes one of the most valuable people in their life. When a partner cheats, however, they are choosing to trade something of great value for something that is worthless. They are trading a human heart for a sinful moment. They are trading treasure for trash.

If you’re familiar with the Old Testament, this may seem similar (in some ways) to Esau trading his birthright for a bowl of soup.

The New Testament mentions this event in Hebrews 12.

Hebrews 12: 15-17 (ESV)

15 See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled; 16 that no one is sexually immoral or unholy like Esau, who sold his birthright for a single meal. 17 For you know that afterward, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no chance to repent, though he sought it with tears.

Read all of Hebrews 12 here!

As you are reading this, many of you are probably thinking that you could never cheat on anyone who deeply loved you. The truth, however, is that all of us already have. We have all cheated on the greatest source of love in our life. I’m just as guilty as you. That is why I’m writing this article.

The Greatest Source of Love

There is no greater source of love in this life than the love that is offered by God. You will never find a greater demonstration of self-sacrifice than what God offers. You will never find someone that knows every detail of you better than God does. We are completely unworthy (by our own merits) to be in the presence of God. God, by all rights, would be justified if He chose to completely disregard us. He is beyond us. He doesn’t need us, but this doesn’t stop Him from demonstrating His love for us.

1 John 4:7-10 (ESV)

7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. 10 In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

If love is what matters the most, and God is love, we can conclude that our relationship with God is the most important relationship in our life. Nothing could be of more value than the love that God demonstrates towards us. When we place any other thing in front of God, we are taking the most valuable gift in our lives and trading it for something that is worthless by comparison.

  • Money
  • Careers
  • Hobbies
  • Dreams
  • Fitting In
  • People

When you find that you are most driven by passions that don’t involve God, you have cheated within the most important relationship in your life. When you find that the things that give you the most joy and excitement in life aren’t God, you have invested yourself into something that is meaningless.

There is only one path in life that is worth walking.

Matthew 7:13-14 (ESV)

13 “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. 14 For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.

Read all of Matthew 7 here!

Don’t let anything in your life distract you from what matters. Let God be the joy, the desire, and the drive of your heart. Let Him be the only mission in your life, and all of the other pieces will fall into place.

I also struggle with this. I was born a sinful man, but I have to remember that God has renewed me. He needs to be my focus. With Him as the focus, the rest makes sense. Without Him as the focus, nothing makes sense. With Him as the focus, my life has purpose. When anything else becomes my focus, I begin to feel lost.

Don’t cheat on God with the passions of this world.

Matthew 7:11-21 (ESV)

11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us. 13 By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. 14 And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. 15 Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. 16 So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 17 By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. 18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 19 We love because he first loved us. 20 If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. 21 And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.

 

1 Corinthians 13 (ESV)

1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. 12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known. 13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

I love you guys. I’m praying for you! Feel free to message me if you need anything!

-Caleb

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Below is the Photo Source for “We Have All Cheated on the Love of Our Life” These artist(s) do not necessarily share my viewpoints, but have kindly released their work under a creative commons licence. Follow the links below to find the original artists and copyright license:

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